Recently, I wrote about our experience when our apartment’s floors flooded during the holidays for No Sidebar, one of my favorite sites about simple living and minimalism (my article is here) Sites like No Sidebar helped me to realize that I was literally making myself sicker—mentally and physically—on the path I was on.
I often feel like an expert in being chronically ill. I know how to look up doctors on my insurance company’s website. I know to ask if they cover me just in case when I make an appointment. I know to ask if the tests are covered as well when they suggest something. I know how many physicals and dental check-ups I get a year and I know what out of network versus in network means. I know how to get reimbursed for out of pocket expenses. I know what an FSA is. I know I can ask my pharmacist if the medications I take could have dangerous interactions.
I love to travel but there are so many moving parts and elements that I cannot control. I worry about forgetting something. This is magnified a thousand-fold when traveling, because if I forgot something I can’t just go back for it later or get it in a few hours. I start to catastrophize—like what will I do if I forget my medication? Or what if I forgot to turn off the oven and my place burns down while I’m gone?
Why do we need to be different? Everywhere this time of year there are advertisements for New Year’s resolutions that will change you: make you better, make you different, make you a new you for the new year. Why do we want that? Why are we so unhappy with who we are?
I need help knowing how to support my husband. He’s been going through a very stressful time at work now for months. It’s dragging out unbearably, but we keep hoping that soon it will be all resolved. In the meantime, he is stressed, and me, as an extremely empathic anxious person, am stressed by his stress. I want to help him and support him, but I also feel anxious and worried all the time by what he’s going through as well as what it means for our lives together and mine with him.